As a radio talk show host, I can tell you that every show ends with a long list of things I did NOT say.
The risk with any communication, and particularly what is said on live radio, television or written on social media, is that it happens in real time, and often the reaction is swift and, in some cases, relentless. Mistakes are costly.
Comedian and talk show host Bill Maher made a big mistake recently when, during an interview, he flippantly said he’s a “house n—–.” Republican Nebraska Senator Ben Sasse jokingly invited Maher to come “work in the fields.” Maher replied, “Senator I’m a house n—–,” then quickly added that it was a “joke.”
He issued an apology later. “I regret the word I used in the banter of a live moment. The word was offensive and I regret saying it and I’m very sorry.” I have some empathy for Maher, not for what he said, but because he made a poor decision on the spur of the moment while trying to be funny and he apologized.
Maher’s illiberal comment followed comedian Kathy Griffin’s tasteless photo of herself holding a bloody mask that looked like Donald Trump’s severed head. Griffin initially issued what appeared to be a heartfelt apology, but then followed that up with a peculiar press conference where she tried to portray herself as a victim.
“A sitting president of the United States and his grown children and the first lady are personally trying to ruin my life forever,” she said. “You guys know he’s not going to stop.”
That was odd, especially after initially taking responsibility for her mistake. Griffin’s act was pre-meditated—she took time to plan out her photo shoot—while Maher’s bad choice was off-the-cuff.
In 2007, radio host Don Imus lost his job at CBS after using a racial slur to describe the Rutgers University women’s basketball team. He initially defended the remark as a joke and said rap artists frequently use the same term to describe black women. Imus later apologized and explained that his show was supposed to be funny, but he went too far.
We could go on and on about the mistakes people have made when trying to be funny or make a point. I think they often happen because the people who make them get too comfortable. When you’re relaxed your inhibitions are lowered, and things that occur to you may pass from your lips in a split second before you have thought them through.
As a radio host, I can tell you that a priority each day has to be discipline. There’s always a fear that a misstep will be particularly hurtful to someone or even career ending. The benefit of these mistakes is that they continue to help set the boundaries (as long as someone else makes them!).
Maher, Griffin and Imus all deserved to be called out for their blunders, but I try not to be too sanctimonious. I am not nearly as controversial as they are, and I would hope that the worst of my intrusive thoughts will never be spoken into a microphone.
Yet, there but for the grace of God go I.